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  • Don't you mean the first?

    Submitted by kevxster on Dec 9, 10 at 8:15pm
  • terrible

    Submitted by jstapes44 on Dec 9, 10 at 10:30am
  • Keep those legs shut.

    Submitted by niceman on Dec 9, 10 at 2:26pm
  • The last part about masturbation makes me think of that American Dad episode where he says it makes God cry and then becomes addicted to it with the cream.

    Submitted by Reikage_Sanshi on Dec 10, 10 at 1:34am
  • Stop eating the paste!

    Submitted by soko on Dec 9, 10 at 12:13pm
  • HAHA WAIT I THOUGHT THAT TOO\n...and then came sex ed

    Submitted by mcsquared on Dec 9, 10 at 6:25pm
    • What? You can't? I gotta tell the other guys..

      Submitted by said8ED on Dec 10, 10 at 4:45am
  • What are you fourteen? Who the hell are raising these kids these days Satan loving liberal socialist?

    Submitted by brokencarwindow on Dec 9, 10 at 10:53am
    • What the hell are you talking about? You know what group is generally against masturbation? CHRISTIANS and the RELIGIOUS. Not 'liberal socialists', whatever that is supposed to mean. Liberals tell their children all about sex rather than lying about it. :/

      Submitted by monicamischief on Dec 9, 10 at 1:30pm
      • ah way to generalize. I'm a Catholic and my parents were always very open about sex. A "liberal socialist" could be just as closed up about sex to their children as a devout Catholic. It more depends on how comfortable they are talking about it with their kids.

        Submitted by michaelafogle on Dec 9, 10 at 2:00pm
    • Orrrr maybe she's of appropriate age to be sexually active, has been safe until now, but just had an "uh-oh" moment with her boyfriend? Just another scenario to consider.

      Submitted by Taipan on Dec 10, 10 at 12:23pm
  • Dude. This text is NOT funny! There was a girl in my hometown that was 13 and she had a baby! She was in 8th grade! And best of all, she goes to a Catholic school!

    Submitted by shetalkstoangels on Dec 9, 10 at 1:01pm
  • Hey, Shetalkstoangels. \nShut the fuck up? \nShe was either a slut, or raped. \nSlut=her fault.\nRaped=it's called the morning after pill.\nPardon my harshness, but for whatever reason, you REALLY piss me off.

    Submitted by xaviorisdeath on Dec 9, 10 at 11:34pm
  • Put a corset piercing on that kitty, sew her shut for good

    Submitted by roflberries on Dec 9, 10 at 6:20pm