I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Randomize