Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
