i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I think my vagina is haunted
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
