singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Randomize
