that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Randomize
