How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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