Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
