Have some text gold?

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  • They all know. Don't drink what she brings you.

    Submitted by sevensevenseven on Jul 18, 11 at 12:27pm
  • if a chick had posted this, there would be a bunch of "slut" comments. instead he gets "what a champ"

    Submitted by karmasabitch27 on Jul 18, 11 at 2:28pm
    • If a key opens many locks its a good key, but if a lock opens with many keys its a crappy lock :D hope you like the analogy.

      Submitted by Stubzy on Jul 19, 11 at 1:34am
      • Way to knock out misogynistic and entirely unoriginal in a single comment!

        Submitted by opalquean on Jul 19, 11 at 1:41am
      • If a lasso gets a lot of bulls, it's a good lasso. But if a bull is always getting lassoed, it's a dumb bull.\n\nSee? I can use completely irrelevant metaphors that don't actually say anything too.

        Submitted by arthurlux on Jul 19, 11 at 9:45am
  • That's not the lemonade you ordered...

    Submitted by pichu180 on Jul 18, 11 at 12:37pm
  • Hooter's?

    Submitted by Michguy on Jul 18, 11 at 1:13pm
  • Champ? I don't think so. Nasty whore is more like it. And sweetheart, you're not "the man" for bagging 3 hoes (and yes, they are hoes just like you for also sleeping around). It means you're a pathetic wretch who has indiscriminate sex. Newsflash: Neither men nor women want to be with someone who sleeps around. Glad I could educate you. Now go get tested.

    Submitted by TheMoreYouKnow on Jul 18, 11 at 4:57pm
  • To all the haters on this post, we know your married and miserable. Now go have your married sex and leave people that have fun in their lives alone. Thanks.

    Submitted by mrmoybueno on Jul 18, 11 at 10:37pm
  • TheMoreYouKnow... Really? This is TFLN. If you can't handle it, take your "life advice" and go troll somewhere else. This post is hilarious. Grow the hell up. That's how adults are: not obsessed with your abstinence childlike view of what sex is.

    Submitted by romanceis_boring on Jul 18, 11 at 7:57pm
    • I agree with the first half of your comment. But you lost me at thats how adults are and abstinence is childlike, you're wrong there sir, but this txt is funny whether you're a virgin or overly experienced.

      Submitted by erisblake on Jul 19, 11 at 10:40am
  • this is soooo funny

    Submitted by mz_baer on Aug 15, 11 at 2:18pm
  • sounds like a small town problem. always makes for awkward situations.

    Submitted by kbowww on Jul 19, 11 at 5:26pm
  • Swag

    Submitted by ybn on Jul 18, 11 at 1:45pm
  • If only you could fuck tuesday in the walk in freezer in the kitchen on her break. Then take Thursday home while Tuesday is distracted with another table. And who cares about Friday, she's already watching you....eye stalking as it were.

    Submitted by melonhead99 on Jul 18, 11 at 9:21pm
  • Promiscuity is not a bad thing. I applaud you sir.

    Submitted by alexanderton18 on Jul 25, 11 at 6:54am
  • I love this guy!!!

    Submitted by minge on Jul 18, 11 at 12:02pm
  • Challenge Accepted

    Submitted by Dragonfire on Jul 19, 11 at 6:32am
  • Wow what a douche, funny but still douchey he's the kinda guy a girl would just be friends w/ because I definitely wouldn't wanna catch anything. haha

    Submitted by missbitch23 on Jul 18, 11 at 11:48am
  • I love this!!!

    Submitted by MissCandy on Jul 22, 11 at 8:46am
  • that's awesome

    Submitted by beewilly14 on Jul 19, 11 at 7:04pm
  • This situation cracks the mates up so much watching their buddy try and work through it hahaha

    Submitted by fullcream on Jul 19, 11 at 2:43am
  • bummer dude, keep your cool

    Submitted by stephaniejos on Jul 18, 11 at 11:55am
  • "the more you know" person is a bitch. Stay fly my friend

    Submitted by cooterspank on Jul 22, 11 at 11:13pm
  • How could this possibly go wrong.

    Submitted by yer_mom on Jul 18, 11 at 7:04pm
  • What a champ!!

    Submitted by markw6807 on Jul 18, 11 at 1:40pm
  • I love how people come on here just to look classy

    Submitted by ModestAnonymouse on Jul 25, 11 at 4:30pm
  • Hahaha this must be Sweet Lou, right?

    Submitted by mvk34 on Jul 18, 11 at 10:36pm
  • Sunday's on the phone to Monday, Tuesday's on the phone to me...

    Submitted by kin_in_in on Jul 20, 11 at 3:01pm
  • Gotta love Kalamazoo... =)

    Submitted by jacki_wacki on Oct 12, 11 at 3:56pm
  • dragonfire! nph ftw! and mvk! grind ftw! yes! btw epic text

    Submitted by ryan13 on Jul 19, 11 at 9:24pm
  • I'm pretty sure I was the "Tuesday" haha

    Submitted by Royaloakgir on Sep 19, 11 at 8:05pm