'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
