I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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