I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
operation harelip BJ is a go
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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