I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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