she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
