just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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