He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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