I'm eating all of the evidence.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I'm always down for nudity.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
