he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
