3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
