So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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