You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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