Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
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