CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
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