I hope mine doesn't look like that
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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