I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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