My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Randomize
