exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
