i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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