Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
