I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
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