I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
