We're like a lot better than the average bears
I showed him my bush... on skype.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Randomize
