I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
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Nice Christian girls often turn into hot-mess, ex-Christian girls who can still act nice in front of your parents, once they discover how much fun sex is. In any event, I suggest you pass on the bar fights.
Good luck finding a boring square
"Nice Christian girl"..... Every religious person is either a liar, a hypocrite, or both. Good luck finding your boring gullible moron.
Christians fought to end the war in Vietnam, helped conscientious objectors get out of doing combat service, and helped establish civil rights for women and African-Americans, among other social-justice causes. Unfortunately that label has been hijacked in the U.S. in recent decades by politically-conservative evangelical Baptists.
You marry the good Christian girl and keep the hot mess as a mistress.
sounds normal to me!