I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize