Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
