She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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