I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Randomize
