that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
