I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
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