Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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