you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
