RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
