normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
