Have some text gold?

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  • Obituaries really should be that funny. It would make death so much less depressing.

    Submitted by Valkyrie on Oct 14, 10 at 6:32pm
  • Try in the VIP room of a strip club in Reno!

    Submitted by cfreymarc on Oct 14, 10 at 4:20pm
  • @ Firstmonday. Go get crucified like you bitch gods son. Or better yet take some acid while on shrooms with heroin being injected into you so that you can write a better bible cause that's what really went down a long time ago. And I don't want to hear the religious people going nuts unless one of them can prove that god exists. Fully. Otherwise stop bitching at people who want to live their lives. Grow the fuck up.

    Submitted by Firebirdrise on Oct 16, 10 at 12:31am
  • SCORPIOOOOOOOOOO

    Submitted by jk_willis on Oct 14, 10 at 9:07pm
  • "I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure"

    Submitted by PonchoWTF_0 on Oct 14, 10 at 10:12pm
  • So if I don't sleep with a guy I will inherit the kingdom of the lord? Doesn't inherit mean it'll be mine? Hell yea.

    Submitted by cincifan91 on Oct 18, 10 at 7:55am
  • panda.

    Submitted by itsblitz on Oct 14, 10 at 3:47pm
  • YEA THO HE WHO LIES WITH ANOTHER MAN AS THOUGH HE IS A WOMAN SHALL NOT INHERIT THE KINGDOM OF THE LORD!!!!!!!!!!

    Submitted by firstmundey on Oct 15, 10 at 11:18pm
    • Come on troll, if you're going to try to quote scripture to piss people off at least quote it correctly, rather than bastardize multiple scriptures and half-assedly throw them together.

      Submitted by Joe_Mama_124332 on Oct 17, 10 at 2:06am
  • Maybe Scorpio, or possibly that new one down in Lake Wylie -- Rainbow something? It looks skeevy as hell.

    Submitted by dtothej on Oct 14, 10 at 11:47pm
    • Def Scorpio, it's free beer night there, HAD to be.

      Submitted by jk_willis on Oct 15, 10 at 12:00am
  • Omg! I fucking love this!

    Submitted by dpizzle123 on Apr 26, 11 at 10:33pm
  • @FIREBURD U GROWTHE FUCKUP BRITNEY!!!!

    Submitted by firstmundey on Oct 16, 10 at 12:22pm
  • Whatre you talking about? Obituaries are the second best part of the paper, next to personals. Especially when youre older and start seeing jackasses from high school that you never liked at all.

    Submitted by Manupbeotch on Oct 14, 10 at 6:14pm