other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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