So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
We need to get me chipped asap
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
