Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
How naked do you want me to be?
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