I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
