She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize