so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
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